Pushing Past Our Comfort Zone
A few weeks ago I decided I was finally prepared to start potty training Giggles and Cuddles. They’re almost three now and for a while they’ve been curious about what goes on in the bathroom, so I felt they were ready. I also wanted to get it done before the weather got really warm outside, as I knew we were probably going to be homebound or close to home for a few weeks. So I did my research, read a book on potty training, checked a few websites, took the girls underwear shopping, explained what was going to happen, stocked up on chocolate, which I was going to use as a bribe, and plunged in.
No matter how much I had read or how many people I had talked to before taking that step, nothing prepared me for the endless days spent cleaning floors and wiping bottoms. I think that’s one of the things that mothers consciously decide to forget, so they don’t tell you the details of how hard it can be. And having twins adds a whole new dimension to the agony of the process.
You often hear that, although with potty training twins you have double the mess, the competition is actually good and helps expedite the process. Well, with the mess I’ve seen I would have been more than happy with zero competition. Accidents almost always happened a few minutes apart, and shouting, “Stop! Don’t move until I’m done with your sister and I’ll come get you!” was simply an open invitation to the girl in question to run around the whole house and totally mess the place up.
I knew I had to be patient and persevere, but I was totally exhausted. I would put them to bed for their nap and just collapse for over an hour on the sofa, unable to move a limb. Just hearing their voices on the monitor after they got up would send my heart racing.
After the challenging first few days, it started to click with the girls and I finally began to see light at the end of the tunnel. We’re still not there yet, but there’s progress every day and I think we’re close. This, however, has been one of the most difficult experiences with the girls so far. Reflecting on that process I realize that it’s all part of growing and becoming more independent. There’s failure, frustration and a whole lot of mess, but the excitement and pride once they’ve started getting it right are unmatched. And you end up with more than double the fun.
It’s similar to when they started going to nursery. The fear of separation and the anxiety subsided after a while, when they realized that they were actually happy and having loads of fun with their new friends. We were away recently for a few weeks, and I thought going back to nursery would be difficult and the girls might be a bit clingy. But the first day they went back they were so excited that they barely kissed me goodbye before running off to play. And it dawned on me then that they’ve actually grown a lot and have become a lot more independent.
As our children grow, we grow with them as well. I certainly feel I have aged going through the potty training experience. Just this morning I booked an appointment to have my hair coloured, as it has suddenly become all grey, and I’m seriously considering a facelift. But looks aside, we learn a lot from our children and we grow as individuals as well. We acquire new skills like patience and perseverance. Just watching our children, we realize that despite the frustration and the anxiety, stepping outside our comfort zones exposes us to a whole new world that despite the challenges can entail lots of happiness, excitement and fulfillment.
By Didi in Zurich
Didi is an Egyptian mother of twin girls living in Zurich. Before having the twins she worked in the field of economic development. She is currently a stay-at-home mom focused on the growth and development of her daughters.
Illustration by Laura Munteanu
Laura has studied Journalism and Advertising, and has been working as a journalist and an illustrator. She has been illustrating for magazines, websites, charity and diverse campaigns. She lives in Zurich with her husband and six-year-old daughter.
